I killed my cat Toonces today, or rather, I had her euthanized..the result is the same. She was 19 years old and was having trouble walking. It was her time.
Richard used to joke about who would die first, Richard or the cat. The cats wins I guess.
I just couldn't stay with her when they gave her the medication. I stayed with my other cat Judy and the feelings were just too intense. I feel the same for Toonces. I wonder why the death of a pet is so upsetting? I cried more for Toonces and Judy than for Richard.
The grieving for him goes on, it's like a weight on my head all the time.
I don't know if I'll get another cat. I won't likely get another husband. He's not replaceable.
Toonces has gone to the Rainbow Bridge. Maybe she's with Richard now.
6 comments:
I think our emotions are so huge for the partner who leaves us behind for the Rainbows that we put much more of our emotional grief into smaller items over time to defuse it all. Missing your beloved seems to only lighten after many years and it never really goes away, but becomes part of who you are, even if you fall in love again - and that is definitely harder to do, but it can happen - when you are ready.
Blessings to you on this Memorial Day weekend.
I'm sorry to hear about Toonces. I also have a 19 year old cat, Buckwheat. She's slow at getting up and limps but can still jump onto the couch and nap, her favorite thing. I've joked with friends that my goal is to outlive her because I don't think she would be as spoiled in my absence.
Teresa -
In a rare act of narcicissim, I "googled" my blog and came across yours thereby. Thank you for following my own journey through MM.
I'll keep this brief: may God bless you and give you solace. I hope Richard is playing with Toonces in addition to watching over you, no longer a prisoner of his disease.
Bless you.
Nick
Thanks Nick. I'm following your progress and have high hopes for your "cure".
Teresa
I am so sorry to hear about your cat. I keep reading your blog and found it after my husband received the words Multiple Myeloma from his doctors. I don't think you ever get over missing the people you love and they can not be replaced by anyone. Enjoy this beautiful day.
Jan
Thanks for your caring comment... and letting me know you are there.
I'm discouraged about the knee healing.
Blessings to you .. This year seems to have 2 Memorial Day weekends. My empathy.
I too wonder if our cat will outlive the myeloma. Sigh.
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